Now I understand

I've always kind of wondered what the fuss is about not being invited to a birthday party. You know, some in the class get invited and some dont. We like to invite all when the kids are younger, but we don't mind the house full. Our kids have learnt to understand that sometimes they get invites, sometimes they don't and they haven't been bothered about it. It's been even surprisingly easy when they've been invited but haven't been able to go due to other appointments.

But now I understand. It's not about the party. At least not with our kids. It's about feeling that you've been rejected. It is a strong emotion and hard to cope with, even for an adult who has been thorougly educated in the matter. It's about "I thought we were friends, perhaps even good ones, and now your actions tell me different". Feeling rejected one easily starts questioning - have I done something wrong? Am I a bad person? Doesn't anybody really like me - I though she did but looks like she doesn't, so what about all the others I thought like me?

Luckily in our case dear 6 year old only overheard a discussion about a party and who would be invited. She didn't hear all, and thinks there's hope she might be in the list. And she thinks the birthday is perhaps in the fall. So hopefully she wont remember it in the fall. Or hear that the party actully is now and invitations have been delivered. The prospect of it was already a cause of some confusion.

I am so glad I was able to dig it out of her and that she said how it made her feel better that she talked about it. Next time it might be a bit easier. Because next time will come, sooner or later.

There often is something you think you really would like to do. Either for work, for pleasure or as an adventure. Something which is not available for you right now.

What happens when the chance comes that you actually might be able to do it. Either to just go and do it or send an application and hope and pray for the best. What kind of decision would you make? Would you have the courage to actually leave the everyday life, the permanent steady job, or other nice and comfortable things? Even if it's something you've always wanted to do.

Certainly it helps out in many cases to pray and ask if it's something that is good for you. Most likely you wont do it, if the answer is no. But how many times we actually could do the things we want or wish for if we just had the courage to act on those moments of opportunity when they arise.

Ihanaa hehkutusta

On loistavaa, kuinka Suomen kansa iloitsee ja riemuitsee Leijonien menestyksestä. Kollektiivisesti kansan itsetunto on pilvissä, me näytettiin niille taas, koko maailmalle, ja erityisesti Ruotsille. Kuin olisi taas pieni valkopukuinen sotajoukko lyönyt suuren ja mahtavan Venäjän. Samaa fiilistä.

Menestys on toki hieno juttu. Mutta pistää miettimään, miksei samalla tavalla juhlita, kun joku kirjailija niittää mainetta maailmalla. Tai joku pieni bändi, joka on tuntematon koko Suomen kansalle, vaikka on täältä lähtöisin. Tai joku muotoilija, vaatesuunnittelija, puuseppä, mikä lie. Joku suomalainen saattaa heistä tietää, mutta ei koko kansa, saati, että juhlisi. Eipä ollut kansanjuhlaa Helsingin keskustassa kun Martti Ahtisaari saapui Nobelin rauhanpalkinnon kanssa.

Olisiko rauhassa ollut kuitenkin enemmän syytä juhlia?

Sometimes

you have days when the only goal is to get through the day. It may include doing many things you've promised to do that day, even good and fun things. Just some days it's more of a chore than pleasure. Or it can be getting through the day even without really "doing anything". It may be caused by many different things - just the simple lack of sleep, sickness, depression, stress and many other things.

It's a worthy goal those days. To get through it. One should be merciful enough to accept it. And not do more than getting through requires. What ever it is in each case. There's always a new day for doing more. Sometimes less is better. For the whole family.