keskiviikko 30. maaliskuuta 2011

Do not judge

but I cannot but feel so sad... I know it's not my job to judge anyone. But when you see people do things that just doens't feel good, it makes me so sad. Especially when it's to do with children.

Swimming halls are great place of observation. I felt so much like talking to that little boy, who always came near his mum, talking, trying to play with... No interaction what so ever. She was capable of speaking or at least looking at and smiling to her son, but no reaction. I felt so sad for the 3-4 year old.

Another mother I've seen there every week... never a nice word to her daughter. Always something to critisize about. Always that tone of voice. Can't you do it right? For the first some weeks she kept almost yelling at her, don't swim like that, or you'll never learn, can't you even try, don't you understand, you need to... Angry looks at her didn't work so finally I asked her to stop doing that because the girl was swimming the way the teacher's teach and she was trying make her do the way she swims - which is not the correct way.

Which made me think: how many times as parents we stress about the child learning something or doing something we think is the right way... causing harm to the child while "trying" to help... And perhaps the thing we stress about is just plain wrong and harmful to the kid...

Stress is hardly ever good. Never the kind imposed by someone else. Not for the adult and never ever for the child.

4 kommenttia:

Grumpy Grateful Mom kirjoitti...

That's too bad that mom was so critical.

Though, I could have been the first mom, except I would be fixing dinner or feeding the baby.

I play with my kids a ton (OK probably not enough), but with four little ones, I want them to learn to play on their own also.

Still, I agree with you. Stress is never good for a child.

mormoniäiti kirjoitti...

I know, we all have those moments. And as far as I know,the first mum, she could have just lost a parent or have something else big in her mind and just focus on surviving and not crying. You never know. But it still made me sad, hoping there is a reason behind...

heini kirjoitti...

Sulla on kyllä niin mahtava blogi. Usein olen just miettinyt samoja aiheita kuin mistä kirjoitat ja saanut niihin vielä lisänäkemystä sinulta. Kiitos siis. Täällä käyn, vaikka kommentointi jää vähiin.

mormoniäiti kirjoitti...

Kiitti Heini :-)